Identify the problem attitude or belief, its physiology and rep system activity.
Sort the problematic belief by rep systems into their eye positions.
Create the images of your desired capability and goal, and place them in the visual constructed space.
Distinguish between representations of the capable image and the failure memories.
Normalize the failure elements (feelings, memories, and self-talk) with positive ones.
Create an anchor for a positive reference experience.
Trigger the positive reference state in connection with your goal.
Test.
How do you change a negative attitude or belief into one that supports your excellence and success? Turn “failure” into valuable feedback and into a winning state that includes curiosity and motivation. Imagine feeling positive and motivated after the ninety-ninth failure. As with Edison and his many “failures” on the way to the light bulb, you are on your way to success with this kind of attitude.
1: Identify the problematic attitude or belief, its physiology and rep systems.
Select an attitude or belief that makes you feel defeated, hopeless, or like a failure. It should be associated with the difficulty that you are having in acquiring or expressing a capability and with achieving a goal that would come from that capability.
For example, let’s say Carl is not making very many sales, and he feels like a failure over it. He feels that he is not communicating in a compelling way and feels very disappointed in himself. In this example, the capability would be compelling communication.
The goal that depends on that capability would be to make more sales. The belief coming from it would be something like, “I can’t sell.” Next, observe the physiology and eye positions associated with your failed belief. You can use a mirror, a friend, or a video camera if you find it hard to observe yourself while you represent an idea in your mind.
Note what is happening internally in each of the representational systems (VAK) during the mental representation of the belief. What do you see, hear, and feel on the inside?
Step 2: Sort the problematic beliefs by rep systems into the corresponding eye positions. #
Use your imagination to slide each of these sensory representations into the corresponding eye position. Turn your eyes (physically, consciously and deliberately) in that direction as you place the representation. For many people, the kinesthetic sense of failure overwhelms their internal (self-) talk and other representational systems. Putting your representational systems in their proper eye positions will help to clear up the muck and make things more manageable. Observe how moving these representations to the side opens up the “space” in front of you for your visual perception of reality. Open your eyes, if you haven’t already.
Step 3: Create images of your desired capability and goal and place them in the visual constructed space. #
Think of the frustrated capability and goal that your failed belief is about. Create a clear image of that capability in action and in terms of its positive intended results (your goal). Use imagery that is very positive. Place this image up and to your right (visual construct) and look at it in your mental space, moving your eyes up and to the right. 4: Distinguish between capable image representations and failure memories. As you focus on the desired capability, sense the main feeling associated with it. Identify the positive intention underlying that feeling. Do the same for your self-talk around that capability. Notice how these are different from the representations of your failure belief. Feelings and self-talk are represented differently.
Step 5: Normalize the failure elements (feelings, memories, and self-talk) with positive ones. #
Look at the memories associated with the belief. By mixing your positive memories with the memories associated with the problem, you can build a more realistic perspective of the total situation. Have them fit into your timeline in the appropriate time sequence. Note what useful knowledge can come from your memories of the situation, even though those memories may be associated with frustrating outcomes or feelings. Note how that useful knowledge can lead you directly to the desired goal. Modify or add elements to the desired goal based on what you learn from looking at the memories. Notice what steps can take you from those memories to the positive goal.
Step 6: Create an anchor for a positive reference experience. #
Think of something positive that you are very certain you can achieve in the future. It can be something that you have done competently and reliably many times. It does not have to be something big. Showing up to work on time is an achievement, even though it is considered basic and mundane. Establish an anchor for that reference experience.
Step 7: Trigger the positive reference state in connection with your goal. #
Adjust the structure of the desired state’s resource synesthesia so that it matches the positive reference experience. In other words, remember the qualities of the sub-modalities, including where they occurred in your mental space. Change the resource state of the goal so that its elements are laid out in the same way and with the same emphasis and sub-modalities such as size and brightness. To help this process, fire the anchor for the positive reference experience while looking at the desired goal.
Step 8: Test. #
You’ll know this pattern is helpful when you experience one or more of the following:
- New approaches to achieving your goal
- A more upbeat and constructive outlook
- a clearer understanding of your goal and how to achieve it, resulting in compelling imagery, feelings, and self-talk.