For many years, as a private therapist, I used grief procedures and value hierarchies to help clients deal with the loss of the life of an unborn baby, be it near the end or beginning of pregnancy. Both parents suffered in that instance. When the very same tragedy happened to my partner and me, I completely changed my approach. Given that it happened inside her body, I was the outsider, suffering the trauma but in an observer position. What worked to soothe her emotionally, and in extension, my own despair as well, was a simple reframe. Since that happened, I have only used that reframe with clients and got amazing, almost instant results. It goes like this: “Whether you believe in God or not, it does not matter to the universe, right? You could keep your old idea that this happened because of something you did or did not do, and how unlucky you are or how bad it made you feel. And it should feel bad. It’s almost the most horrible thing that can happen to a person, besides losing a child who was already out there in the world making a fuss and impacting our lives. What if we take this idea and look at it from a different angle? Every baby has a body and a soul, and that soul came from somewhere. Now, just like we sometimes get a call and someone says to us, “Oh, sorry, it’s the wrong number” and hangs up abruptly, that could be the situation here. That soul was sent to you, and at the last second, before it’s too awkward, it realized it was the wrong number and hung up, went back up to heaven, or wherever it came from, and was sent again to the right uterus somewhere else. Maybe it’s the soul that was meant for an Australian couple who struggled for years to have a baby, and right now they see the blue lines on the pregnancy test. But wait a minute-what about you? Where is your baby? A moment ago, you were expecting to give birth in February, and now you’re not. You know it deep inside. Your baby’s soul is on the line. It’s a waiting call, and it couldn’t come to you while the wrong call was occupying the line. Now it’s going to be patient and wait for your body to recover, regain your strength, and heal, so that his or her soul can finally ascend from heaven, or from wherever they send new souls to earth, and make you and your husband joyful, just like that Australian couple. You just have to wait your turn, and it’s coming. Allow it to come by vowing to heal as fast as you can and let go of that sadness. You did not lose a baby; it was taken away because it did not belong to you. Mistakes happen, even in heaven, and all you can do is look forward to the future.“