When a client tries to establish a rule in order to justify a presupposition or mind reading, instead of arguing the illogical implications of his argument (which is useless as the client is convinced of their righteousness), we can switch it around to minimize the impact of the rule.

Step 1: Pace the statement or rule. #

Step 2: Apply the paced statement to its most plausible implication. #

Step 3: Switch the referential index to put the client on a continuum rather than a strict measurement. #

For example: the client says she feels her husband does not care about her because he doesn’t give her flowers. A Referential Index Switch could be “Well, how many vases do you have to fill with flowers so that he is aware of how much he cares about you?”. In essence, we tell her that her rule for someone else’s feelings is rigid and that even following it to the extreme is not going to affect the other person’s state. It is her feelings that she needs to take charge of, not what someone else has or has not in their hidden thoughts.