Self-sabotage is s a form of self-defeating behavior when you work against your own values and expectations. In other words, you recognize that there is something out there that you genuinely want and believe is good for you, but you then do things that directly contradict that desired outcome.
When it comes to self-sabotage, it’s important to note that it can be both conscious and unconscious, depending on your level of awareness. In the case of conscious self-sabotage, you are aware that what you’re doing is counterproductive to one of your outcomes or value systems.
The term “unconscious self-sabotage” refers to when you do something that hurts a desired outcome or value but you don’t recognize it until after you do it. Show this list to a client and ask them to put an asterisk next to any word that brings up an emotional reaction. If a certain memory pops up in their mind, they can write down a short sentence to describe it. Once they’re done, you’ll have a general roadmap of that person’s mental map and a list of issues to work on beyond the presenting problem they came in with.